like honestly, sleeping next to someone is the nicest thing. like when you half wake up at 4am and squeeze them or they move in tighter to you. lovely.
deciding to color your art more like
"normal teenagers would throw a party, but I stayed at home reading books and watching movies omg i’m so weird XD"
people who feel comfortable pooping anywhere other than their house are not to be trifled with
Oh—you wouldn’t date a girl who’s ever been a stripper?
In that case, I wouldn’t date a guy who’s ever been to a strip club.
Oh—you wouldn’t date a girl who’s ever done porn?
In that case, I wouldn’t date a guy who’s ever watched porn.
You’re the reason we exist.
You’re the demand to our supply.
If you disdain sex workers, don’t you dare consume our labor.
As they say in the industry, “People jack off with the left hand and point with the right.”
reblog if your dick is longer than your arm
Man this series makes no fucking sense
we’re terribly sorry, but you can’t put your disobedient child in the stowaway luggage, you’re just going to have to carry on your wayward son
are pears flammable
after 2 hours of trying to set alight to a pear i can condclude they are not flammable
mum: whats that smell
me: burning pears
me: i tried to set a pear on fire
[science clapping] well done friend
you forgot your data table: